La Douleur Exquise

This is a quality that I seek when reading or watching TV or movies.  I want to feel that pain right along with the characters.  It's got to hurt... and the reasoning can't be something stupid or simple.  There needs to be a real issue (object of affection is dating your brother/best friend... object of affection is a blue and you're a red... object of affection is an alien or other supernatural being...).  It's always a 'hurts so good' kind of thing when experiencing this through the eyes of a character.

But... it isn't any fun at all in real life.  Trust me, I know.

The reasons for the differences are the rules of the story.  When you're watching or reading something, you know there are rules.  Writers follow the rules, because the person watching/reading the story has expectations.  If you don't live up to those expectations, you won't make it; your story will fail just moments before your career.  Fizzle...pop.  The expectation is simple: no pain, no gain.  The moment when they do kiss will be so perfect that ever bit of pain will have been worth it...But, the longer they draw it out, the better.  If they're still not madly in love AND together by the end of book 2 or the second season, you're in for the best finale ever.  I'm a fan of 'romantic tension' and will actually stop reading/watching if the relationships are too easy.

But... there are no such rules in real life.  We're all raised on stories and there is no real life equivalent.  When we're writing our lives, and the object of our affection is unattainable, no amount of suffering ensures a payoff in the end.  Even if the longing is deep, the moments you spend with your unattainable person charged with electricity, and the possibilities seemingly endless... in real life, unattainable is a much more final state.  Even if the reasons are stupid and petty, as they often are.  There is really very little to look forward to in real cases of unrequited love...or even just the unrequited crush.  :|  What I wouldn't give for a bit of the supernatural getting in the way...

"Oh, you're a werewolf?  I completely understand."  I'm calling to see if I can have you committed...

"Our families have been mortal enemies since the beginning of time...and something about dragons?  Okay, I get it."  Even though that might make you more attractive to me...except for that thing about dragons....

But what are the real reasons that average people face?  I don't care for that hairstyle... You aren't very tall...  we have different taste in music... are you really going to wear that?  I don't like your dog.  Your job isn't impressive.  You have debt and you aren't rich.

No spark.

No need.

I'm not sure unrequited would be any less painful if there were werewolves or aliens or multi-generational feuds involved...I'm not even saying that it'd have that kind of awesome tension that exists in fiction... but I am saying it'd be more interesting.  This is why I like fiction so much.

And also why I find real life so insufferably boring sometimes.