The Colossal Disappointment

The Trylle "trilogy" by Amanda Hocking has taken its place at numbers 2 through 4 on the WORST BOOKS I'VE EVER READ list.

And I hate to say that, because had she an editor, these books could have been great.  The grammatical errors and type-o issues throughout made me think that it was just a sloppy conversion to .mobi.  No one would publish something with so many errors, right?  Wrong.  When self-publishing, I guess editing isn't a concern.  At times the errors made the story hard to read.

And then there's the story... Probably the biggest issue I have here is that this is not a trilogy.  This is another thing an editor could have helped with...or someone, anyone!  The author had to have shown this to someone before self-publishing, right??  In a trilogy (or series...) there is an overall issue (main story) and some smaller battles or issues (all of the sub-stories) that lead to the ultimate resolution.  Sub-stories can be individual novels...so long as the ultimate goal remains present.  Take HP, for example... There's the overall battle of good vs. evil, almost everyone vs. Voldemort.  Each book had elements of that, yet each was its own story leading toward the resolution.  The books built on each other.  With each resolution, lessons were learned and characters grew...making them into characters who were capable of the final resolution.  The Trylle books did not have sub-stories.  There weren't lessons learned in books 1 and 2...they didn't end in appropriate places...they didn't work as stand-alone novels.  The rise and fall of action never happened.  There was very little growth, especially considering the circumstances. Had these books been seen by an editor, one book would have been the result.  And that one book probably would have been decent.

Maybe.  I guess now it's time for the spoilers.  It took 26% of the first book for something to happen.  Before then it was just weird girl and her nice friend and weird guy who stares at weird girl all the time.  Not too much going on... but then, all of a sudden, weird guy tells weird girl that she's a troll.  And so is he.  I was not sure what to think...trolls!?  But, no one writes about trolls.  It's a good idea.  And these trolls were sexy...  They run off to the land of the trolls, and weird girl is informed that she's a princess.  A very special princess.  And she's also completely in love with weird guy.  Thing is, she's a princess, and he's little more than a slave - it'll never work...they'd both be exiled.  There was a lot of running away...and then it was over, with no resolution and without anything much really happening.  There are some mildly dramatic things that happen in the next books, but they're all resolved far too simply.  The secondary characters are far more interesting than the main character, and as the book is a first person narrative, that's very disappointing.  Her voice isn't at all unique.

Anyway... girl can't have the guy she loves, and for the good of the kingdom, she marries a guy she doesn't love.  It's ok though, because he doesn't love her either, and they're good friends.  The night before the wedding, the guy she loves comes to her and wants just one night with her...but she says one night isn't enough.  Then, a bunch of random things happen.  People behave in ways that don't really make sense...the most interesting aspect of the story - the class system in the troll world, which is preventing lots of relationships - is glossed over.  There are some war things with the bad trolls...there are some mildly political deals made...there are plans to help other trolls and make things better.  Then, somewhere near the end of the third book, after spending all this time thinking that girl is going to change the world when she's queen so that she can be with the man she really loves, girl ends up cheating on her husband with random guy who came from the bad troll camp and has asylum.  She wants just one night with him...but he doesn't think one night is enough.  Right here she should have stopped and remembered her conversation with the guy she used to love...but that isn't what happened.  Husband wants a divorce anyway because he doesn't love her... and so... she ends up marrying the guy she cheated with...not the one she loved for most of the story.  She married 2 guys in less than a year...and no matter how happy and in love she seemed with the second, it's still the wrong guy.  He was high-ranking, so it was a lot easier to write him in and make them get married than it would have been to change the world and write a love story that worked.  Oh well.  There was no conclusion.  There was no progress.  The world was just as messed up in the end as it was in the beginning, but hey, she married a guy who was her equal, and the one she'd loved was flirting with someone who was his equal... happy endings all around... :|

It just felt like...rather than take the time to do things right, the author took lots of easy ways out...and wound up with a very disappointing trilogy that could have been a really good novel.  What a shame.  It was sometimes painful to read simply because I was thinking about how good it could have been.

Faeries are Fun!

I've been a bad, bad blogger as of late... and I am sorry.  Between the kid, the job (at the library...awesome, right?), the classes, and the Kindle, I find myself without the time to waste online... my farm is dead.  I've received complaints due to my lack of Facebook activity.  I suppose it doesn't help that I also got a new phone and it's a bit of a bitch to work with.  Oh well.  I'm sure that in time all will fall into place and I won't feel like falling asleep at 7:30.  This last week I've had an excuse, though.  Thanks to my having spent the better part of the last 3 years at home, my immune system is shot.  I thought I was feeling better, but as it turns out, I'm not... not really.  I'd like a bio-hazard suit...it'd make my day to day interactions with the real world much easier.

So, anyway... the Kindle.  His name is Henry and I love him.  For the longest time I was very anti-ereader.  I always thought that there was something special about having a physical book - something romantic and full of history and meaning - like a paper letter.  No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't imagine myself curled up with an ereader of any kind.  It seemed unnatural.  Henry is perfect, though.  There wasn't even a period during which I found myself trying to turn pages.  Within minutes I was wondering why I hadn't gotten one sooner...  I do still love real books.  I like the smell of a new book...and even some old books (so long as it's JUST book smell...not any of the many interesting fragrances I've had the displeasure to encounter in books...).

The first thing I read on the Kindle was Go the F**k to Sleep.  While it wasn't exactly nice-looking on my little black & white screen, the story was great.  I have a feeling that someday Oliver will outgrow his good sleep phase and I'll really understand the story better.  My kid tells me when he wants to go to bed, and he means it.

After that, I decided to read something with more of a story.  I didn't actually know what I was getting myself into, though.  I read nothing about the books prior to reading them.  All I knew was that the male lead had gone up against a character from another series I've read, and that he lost...but that it was close.  Anyway, had I known it was about faeries, I might not have been so eager.  Anyway...these are the books I read:

The thing that nearly stopped me from reading these books is that they're Harlequin Teen.  Never in my life have I considered reading Harlequin...never...until these.  And guess what?  I wasn't entirely disappointed.  The writing wasn't fantastic, and the majority of the story was predictable, but it was still decent.  I was entertained.  It was nice to know the characters a bit (Oberon and Puck...etc.), and there was a real-enough conflict - technology was killing the Fey...people weren't believing in them, or were forgetting about them.  There's a love triangle, but both guys are pretty desirable.  There's the usual dark *bad* guy and the goofy best friend guy...and it's all very predictable, but still decent.  The first book was probably the best.  I really liked the descriptions of the faery world.  The author tied everything to scents, which was genius.  The spring/summer world smelled warm, like sunshine, grass... and gardens and warmth.  The fall/winter world had a crisp, cold scent, like snow and ice.  It was good world building.  :)  Anyway... I got to the end of book three in what I thought was a trilogy, only to be left unsatisfied...and having to wait until October 25th to find out what happens next.  This story will be from a different perspective, so...I kinda look forward to that.  

Anyway... decent enough books.  Haven't decided if they're library-worthy.  I'll know after reading Iron Prince... :)

Things in the mail.

My Kindle arrived today.  I've been collecting books for quite some time, so... goodbye interwebs!  I have a feeling I'll be stopping by only long enough to comment on books I've been reading. :)

About a book...

So, I just remembered that I forgot to write about a book.  I feel a little weird writing about a book that isn't completely fresh in my mind, but hey - I liked the book quite a bit :)  It was Clockwork Angel by Cassandra Clare - book 1 of The Infernal Devices.  I read all the books from the author's previous series, The Mortal Instruments, and liked them.  The series isn't done, but it's decent.  This book, though, promises a series better than the first.  The characters are the ancestors of those in TMI, so in a sense, this is a prequel series.  It's set in the 1800s in London - which I like.  The descriptive writing is great... but I had a love-hate thing with the characters.  I loved them a lot more than those in TMI.  Yet, for a while I was having trouble liking any of them, or the way in which they seemed to be created.  They are all basically the same as those in TMI.  The good-ish girl who doesn't know what she really is but proves herself stronger than anyone suspects, the bad boy she loves who fights off his love for her, and the other boy who has feelings for someone, but we don't know if it's the guy or the girl this time.  Even their personalities were beyond familiar.  I do understand that they're related to characters I already know, but sort of think that it was a bit of a cop-out to make them so much the same.  By the end, though, I loved them.  More than I expected to... but in a more refined way.  The story itself was every bit the urban fantasy I love, but the twist of it also being historical made it even better.  The historical aspect made the love story more complex, too.  While it is YA, and anything terribly sexual is unlikely anyway, the tension of an old-fashioned courtship was pretty great.  They're still teenagers, with raging hormones...but so reserved... so careful.  The book left quite a bit open at the end, though.  I was really angry when it was over, because it's not until December 6th that the next book comes out.  I really wish the publication process were faster.  BUT!  It's really great to have a book I'm looking forward to again!  :)  I really wish I was still awake enough to go into detail about how good this is... but with my state of sleepiness, I'd probably just give everything away.  Then again, it's not like the author gave that much away.  

Forget world peace...visualize using your turn signal.

There are some days when all I want to do is drive around with no destination in mind... drive around and listen to music.  I was up and as cute as is humanly possible quite early this morning.  I had a rather short job interview, and a rather long list of things I needed to get done.  Immediately following the interview, I changed into clothes that'd allow me to survive 96 degrees plus high humidity.  We desert dwellers don't function well with ANY humidity... Anyway, I decided to head to Starbucks.  As I was leaving, some old lady who was going way too fast in the parking lot almost hit me.  Head on, even.  On my way home from Walmart, an old guy pulled out of a driveway right in front of me.  He looked RIGHT AT ME while driving toward me in the wrong lane.  He continued to look at me as I stopped...and waited for him to figure out which lane he was supposed to be in, and then get there. By the time I got home, I was pretty tired of people.  Sadly, I had more stuff to do... so off I went.  I took the long way, through a school zone, because I figured the idiots would be avoiding that area. Not so.  An old lady who was busy watching some people didn't bother to look AT ALL when pulling out at a stop sign.  She wasn't looking forward.  She never looked anywhere except out the driver's side window.  I did have to speed in a school zone to avoid being hit by her...but oh well.  I managed to go a couple blocks without incident and return one of my library books.  Two blocks later some idiot on a motorcycle...who was going the opposite direction...decided to cut into my lane (driving right toward me) and then into a parking lot.  Had I been further away from him I would have been okay with this.  Had he used a turn signal AND been further away, it would have been great.  Bleh.  What a day for driving.  Also - just for the record - if you're already half way into my lane, it's a bit late for the turn signal.  Nice thought, though.

I ended up sitting in the car beside my mailboxes, listening to Silversun Pickups - Kissing Families as loudly as I could stand it.  I have road rage.  I swear.  I've flipped old people off.  Today I managed to go through all that without flipping anyone off...and only swore a few times.  I'll admit that I'm not a great driver.  The thing is, I know the basics.  I know which lane is mine.  I know that it's generally a good idea to look before pulling out of driveways and before pulling away from a stop sign.

Sometimes I wonder if this SUV is invisible.  Like, there's some kind of magic cloaking device...like the Weasley's flying car.  It's just one that I'm not aware of...

Guess it's time to stop avoiding all the toys on the floor...

This is not a Book.

Initially, I planned to come here to write about the book I finished earlier...and I will write about it, probably tomorrow, but... my brain is mushy due to emotional exhaustion.  Thanks, internet, for giving me glimpses into the grieving processes of children.  I also think I could go the rest of my life without anyone else I know being terrified and sorrowful when their newborn is seriously ill.  It's been a rough week for many of my acquaintances.  It's been a week that's made me increasingly grateful for all that I have.  People put it all out there, now...all that raw emotion... it really is amazing.  It'd all be so much easier to deal with if I weren't such an emotional sponge.  Suppose this is why I'm useless in situations with high levels of emotion - it's not that I can't deal with the emotions of others, I just absorb them.  Even if I hardly know the people.  In a sense, I'm okay with this...affliction... yet I don't feel that I'm good at *being there* for others in times of need when I've completely shut down.

Despite all the things that've done me in emotionally, the only thing that's made me cry has been So You Think You Can Dance!  I called it from auditions - Melanie just had something special about her.  Anyway...here's the the only dance from the entire season that actually made me cry...all happy tears :)

Well, I guess that's not entirely true.  There was one death in the book I finished that got to me... and not so much the death, but the way it was dealt with...a hero's send-off for a peasant.  There's something about that sort of thing that gets to me... in a good way.  :)

Feed

I read another book.  Big surprise, right?  I almost liked it.  I really want to say that I liked it.  The truth is, though, that I only liked the ideas that were hinted at - the stuff that lay under the surface of a really dull story about really annoying kids.  It was called FEED, and was written by M.T. Anderson.  How is going to the moon for spring break dull, you may wonder?  Well...when the whole thing is described by shallow idiots, it never comes across as something interesting.  All the shallow idiots have feeds: devices in their brains that are primarily for consumer activities.  They tell them what they want to buy, what's on sale, what's cool... They also serve as search engines, getting them any information want want immediately.  Feeds also keep people in contact - like instant messaging in their head.  And of course all their favorite TV shows are broadcast right into their heads as well.  That's probably why all the characters were shallow idiots.

Everything going on in the background is interesting, though.  The lesions are interesting - why are people getting lesions?  Why are they cool?  The questions aren't actually answered, but there are lots of possibilities.  Why are the clouds(tm) artificial?   The things that I found most interesting were the political commentary and the views on consumerism.  Schools had been bought out by corporations when the government stopped funding them... and School(tm) taught really useful things, like what to buy and how to decorate your room.  I was pretty disgusted while reading that, yet can't help but wonder if that's a direction we're going in now...  The disintegration of language was done very well...and was another of those things that hit me with a little wave of nausea because I can see that we're on our way there already.  There is a LOT of swearing, but the words mean almost nothing in context; the characters aren't aware of alternatives.

There's only one thing that actually happens in the entire book - and this is going to be a big spoiler, because I just have to comment on it in detail.  One of the characters is sick.  Her feed is failing, and she's poor.  Because the feed is linked in with all of her bodily functions, she deteriorates physically as well as mentally.  Before realizing the severity of her situation, she starts playing games with her feed - trying to trick it.  She tries to see if there is a way to make it have no idea what sorts of products to recommend, so she starts looking at and requesting information about all kinds of random things.  When they realize that she needs serious help to keep her functional, she and her father make pleas to the feedware company for free repairs.  They figure that since it's life or death, they'll help.  Of course they don't...but the reasoning is depressing.  They didn't find her valuable.  They couldn't figure out what sorts of things she wanted to buy, and she hardly ever made any purchases, so saving her would not be profitable.

In the book, nothing was ever as good or as satisfying as anyone wanted... Nothing was very important.  No one focused on much of anything because there was just so much going on - and all their decisions were being made for them.  Overall, the book gets a B-.  I'm knocking off an entire letter-grade because reading it was intellectually painful.  Being trapped in all that idiot-speak may have killed some brain cells.  Part of me really wants to give it a C, because all the background stuff might be lost on a younger reader... but I have to hope that we're not that far gone as a society.  Yet.